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Huh... where do you live? (archive)

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Posted by 747 on June 30, 2001 at 13:08:42:

In Reply to: I have three wrecked BMW's!!!! posted by BAS on June 30, 2001 at 08:05:01:

I'd like to stay clear... :)

PS: Here's something that might help, try this -

line up all 3 cars side by side but (this is important) with the middle facing south, other 2 facing north, pop open the hoods and trunks and roll down all windows.

Then get 3 GI joe action figures (the bad guys) and put on each a tag with the name of your favorite Stealer Salesman, Service Imagineer and Mechanic. Place Salesman doll in middle car hanging from the hood latch (use your imagination as to how to hang it). Other dolls similarly placed in the other cars. Finally pin original receipts for defective work like tinting or the initials of your local public works department, valet service etc. on the damaged areas of each car.

Now crank up a Gregorian chant on the stereo of the middle car and, first slowly but with increasing speed start doing the "Hey Mr. Tally Man, Tally me Beemers" dance around the cars. Each time you pass one of the dolls slap it twice as you shout "HEY". Do this for 5 minutes or until either of the dolls begs for mercy.

Of course this must be done at midnight on your driveway. If you can do this on the 4th of july just as the fire works go off it will also take care of future service and repairs (CEO - certified exorcised ownership)

(OK OK so it's saturday morning and I am bored... guess I'll go wash her)

Just took delivery of a 2001 740i Sport and the window tinters dented the trunk two weeks ago. My wife has a 2001 330CiC that a truck backed into in a parking lot yesterday and destroyed the rear bumper and trunk lid, and we have a 2000 328i that fell in a trench in the road that a road crew "forgot to put the metal plate on." I give up...

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