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ALL OF YOU GUYS ARE FUCKIN STUID-MATURITY????-DAMM (archive)

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Posted by YOU PEOPLE DONT DESERVE TO OWN THIS CAR on October 09, 2000 at 19:21:00:

In Reply to: Damn ricers!!! LONG posted by ///Mstein on October 08, 2000 at 20:48:41:


They run in packs, not unlike the rats they resemble. I'd like to have a nickel for every time a pack of these "two-bit" Honda's pulled along side my M3 and attempted to race me. Are we the enemy? After too many encounters, all of which I refused to take the bait, I finally let in and gave them what they wanted. I suggested we go to a secluded road..I didn't want to risk getting caught by the local Barney Fife. I was the leader of the troop and told them that if they could at least stay on my bumper I'd be willing to fill the lucky guy's gas tank. I did this knowing that they didn't stand a chance. I slowly crept out in first, revving high and hoping this would scare them enough to back off. Then a slow shift into second, still keeping the revs up and getting ready to pour on the steam. Once I reached 4000 in second gear I dumped the throttle and the race began. I had about a half mile before I would have to back off for a second gear turn, I was pulling away from them quite easily and preparing for the approaching curve. I began the downshifting/braking sequence.....WHAM! One of the little SOB's failed to maintain his braking threshold and got out of control, my bumper was the only thing that could slow him down. He hit me with such force, my bumper is now sitting at the same height as my rear window. Wait, it aint over yet.... the force of the blow pushed me off the road and into a swamp. My car is now sitting in three feet if the smelliest water you can imagine. Old riceboy stayed on the road and got out of his battered toy, asked me if I was hurt and offered to call the police. POLICE!!!! Is he f-ing crazy or what?! I told him to put his cell phone back in the car while we talk it out. Well, is idiot friend already dialed 9-1-1 and was talking to a dispacher. Not 5 minutes later Barney Fife and company arrived, bullit and all. There was no quick way to explain what happened...so I told the truth. this got me a one way ticket to the station via Barney Express. I was cited for breaking too many laws to count and fined accordingly. On the other hand, riceboy got off the hook because it was MY idea to race and not his. After refusing to "play" with these punk kids for at least two years, the one time I did it I got my ass in a sling. The car will fix, however the smell may never go away since there was raw sewage in the swamp. The water was almost deep enough in the car to totally ruin the seats. Thankfully the dash was not submerged but could still be trashed. I'm out one killer 89 M3 and I have legal bills out the wang. This is the biggest crock of sh*T ever, but I had it coming. Let this be a lesson to you all.... look before you leap, you never know what's on the other side of the fence! Be careful out there, riceboy will get you one way or another.





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