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How about this one? (more) (archive)

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Posted by Jon on March 08, 2001 at 16:02:08:

In Reply to: Re: Nother Asshole dinged my door, I HATE THAT!! posted by Rob Anderson on March 08, 2001 at 14:42:21:

Once, I parked my car in front of a restaurant in an end space, very close to a fence on one side. There was only about a foot between my car and the iron fence.

So, as is usual in this situation, I sat next to the window so I could mean, keep an eye car while eating.

At some point I looked up to see an old lady trying to squeeze between my car and the fence. I have no idea why she would do this. There was no room and there was even a handicap ramp two cars down. It didn't look good. Then, she fell down between my car and the fence, dropping her leftover salad and burritos all over my hood and fender. Oh, great.

So, there she was, grappling on my car with her old husband trying to help her up. A guy saw this and immediately came to help her up. After she was up, she just kind of sat on my hood for a while complaining about twisting her ankle on the curb.

What was I going to do? She was a frickin' old lady! The situation looked under control so I just sat there waiting. After a few minutes, she's ready to go. So did she go around to the handicap ramp and down to the Cadillac? Hmm...nope. Instead, she decided that without the leftovers, it would be easier to continue between my car and the fence using both for support.

I wanted to run out there and beat some sense into those people but she was already half way through and I figured it was already too late, so I just sat, in agony, as she pawed her way down the side of my car leaving big handprints of burrito sauce, salad dressing, and old lady powder-makeup-stuff down the whole side of my car. Argh.

After cleaning off the leftovers, I found some scratches from rings, tortilla chips, or whatever.
Damn old people!

So, in addition to covering your car, you might want to put up a sign that says, "No unattended children or elderly allowed near car."


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